Dear Mammy,
How are you? I am fine. I think I’ve just about recovered from The Incident. I’ve been having a great time and am glad that I’ve got a couple of chill out days by the beach - badly needed!
So! Well I think one of the most memorable experiences so far, in fact possibly in my life was the whale watching trip I went on. I was extremely lucky as they put on an extra afternoon trip due to demand. That meant that there were only about 30 people on the boat with me so I was able to get a good view! We had to drive (sail? Uh, boat?) to where the whales were, which took about half an hour. Once they were spotted we pulled up alongside them and THERE THEY WERE!! There were 5 of them all swimming along being all whaley. They were simply magnificent. We had a good hour with them and my jaw just hit’s the floor every time I think about it. The best bit was when one of them swam right up by the boat. Seriously, this thing was about 6 feet from the boat and huuuuge! I nearly fainted. I think it’s something I’ll remember for a very long time to come. The guide said that we were lucky too, because the group that morning had not seen half as much as we did.
Wait til I tell you though, and I’m so embarrassed to have to admit this right… As we were pulling away I figured the show was over and was feeling a little peckish so I decided to have a rummage in my back pack for some biscuits I had stashed in there. Well, the next thing all I hear is this big “wooooooo!!” from everyone around me. I looked up and what could I see only a big bloody splash. Apparently one of the whales had breached! And of course what was I doing at the time?? Rummaging in my bag for a feckin biscuit. It wasn’t even a *nice* biscuit, it was a boring one, a bit like a dry digestive (actually, it was one of the ones that the knock-off kit-kat thief left behind). Typical me! That said, it was still an awe-inspiring and very special afternoon.
Sunday evening I went to see a comedy show by the Umbilical Brothers. Look them up on You Tube (get Scott to show you) - they’re fantastic. All they do is mime and make sound effects, they don’t have any set but my goodness, for such a simple concept they’re incredible!! I went with Emma (from the train) which was cool, it’s nice to go to something like that with someone else.
On Monday I went out to Rottnest Island with one of the girls that was sharing my room in the hostel, Sharon from Holland. It’s about half an hour from Freo by ferry, and it’s a real holiday island. There are no cars really, and everyone’s just there to relax. I saw some beaches that could have come straight off a sun tan lotion add, I very nearly stayed! We were also really lucky to see some quokkas. They basically look like little kangaroos and no, they weren’t wallabies smartie pants! Interesting story actually; a Dutch explorer (I’ve forgotten his name) discovered the island. When he landed he saw all these (what we now call) quokkas but didn’t know what they were. They looked like big rats to him, so he named the island “Rat’s Nest” island - et viola - Rottnest. Anyway, I digress…
We decided to rent a tandem bike and cycle around the island. It’s pretty small so we figured it would be easy enough. Yeah, nobody mentioned the hills… Seriously, one or two of those hills would put Patrick’s hill in Cork to shame, so I’m not too proud to say we actually got off and walked. The problem I suppose, was that we didn’t get enough momentum, and my giggling fits weren’t really helping.
That evening when we got back to the hostel Sharon and I decided to go out and grab a bite to eat. Well, that was the plan anyway. It didn’t really work out that way. She had heard of this place called “The Dean” which had a backpackers night on Mondays so we said we’d check it out. Unfortunately when I found out that the FREE food was hot dogs I was a little fed up of being a non-hot-dog-eater. I didn’t cave though, the idea wasn’t too appealing.
Anyway, yes, so, we got there and there was a big bunch of lads at the bar. We went looking for seats and to cut a long story short, one of the most handsome guys I’ve ever laid eyes on in my life had us settled at a table about 30 seconds later. Conveniently surrounded by football players. Mental note to self - if you’re going to go to a bar, bring a Dutch girl, the fellas seem to like that heehee! We had a great time hanging out with them, and we found out that their football (Ozzie Rules not Gaelic obviously) team had just won the league so they were out celebrating. And celebrate they did! Be jaysus they were knocking into those drinks like the sun wasn’t ever going to rise again… I have to say I did have to do a bit of ducking to avoid the advances of one particularly amorous dude but I’m pleased to say I escaped. I know, I’ll never find a husband this way but you know, a lady must have standards mother!! He was very handsome to give him his due but also VERY drunk. Ah I couldn’t be doing with that now. It was a very fun night to be sure!
The following day I moved down to Cottesloe to spend a few days at the beach. I decided that, after the madness of the Swan Barracks I had to get away from Northbridge, party capital of Perth before my liver packed up and left. I got lost on the way to the hostel but I was rescued by a nice man called Ken in his van who showed me where the town was, and brought me directly to the hostel.
Cottesloe is lovely. It’s a little beach suburb of Perth with a glorious beach and an alcohol free hostel - just what the doctor ordered methinks! Initially I had an 8 bed dorm to myself so I did a bit of naked twirling around just because I could. 3 others have moved in since to the naked twirling is no more. I don’t mind though, my derriere was getting cold anyway. Today, down at the beach I thought I saw a shark in the water!! Well, I think it was a shark. It could have been a dolphin because it did move through the water like a dolphin. That said, I’ve never seen a dolphin with 2 dorsal fins before so I‘ve a sneaky suspicion that that wasn‘t no kind of dolphin if ya catch my drift! I’m a little glad it’s a bit cold yet for swimming. I contented myself with lolling on the sand reading. My life is, like, sooo hard… hehe.
So that’s it from me. I’ll be moving up to Coral Bay on Friday and I’m planning to stay there a week anyway. I’ve decided that I’m going to give myself a PADI course for my birthday so hopefully I’ll be able to do that there. Otherwise I’ll move up to Exmouth and do it there. I’ll keep you posted either way.
Hope all’s well at home. Did you check the light in the attic? I think it might still be on…
Love you lots!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Friday, September 17, 2010
Perth, Freo and *The Incident*
Blog - Perth and Freemantle
Dear Mammy,
How are you? I am fine. I thought to myself I’d better write and update you on what I’ve been getting up to. If the truth be told I’m still a little bit shook up after “The Incident” this morning, but I’m determined not to let it ruin my trip. More on that subject once I’ve composed myself; even thinking about it makes me howl like a banshee on fire.
All in all, Perth is absolutely gorgeous. I didn’t quite understand what the guidebook meant when they described Perth as ‘liveable’. I think I get it now. It’s a modern city with everything your little heart could want (even if you made something up just for the hell of it and demanded that, they’d probably have that too), but the city also has a lovely laid back vibe. It makes me wonder if they really do have it sussed - work to live, NOT live to work. I think the fact that the city itself is so pretty just adds to the overall atmosphere.
I’ve done a lot of the usual touristy stuff. Sorry? OF COURSE I did the Big Jolly Tourist Bus. Really, what a ridiculous question… I’ll let you away with it but only because you’re my mammy, and I’ve not forgotten that wooden spoon Iloveyoumammy… where was I? Oh yes, the bus. As usual the ticket lasted for 2 days so I was able to get my money’s worth (I know, you’re very proud). The first day, I went up to Kings Park. WOW. The scenery is divine and the views are incredible. They even have some examples of boab trees - I’ve never before seen a tree that could just as easily hopped out of Tim Burton’s imagination. I *want* one. Not sure what I’d do with it mind you, but that hardly matters now, does it??
I went to Perth Zoo too. I think I’d like to work in the zoo, it looks like such a fab place to work. But I digress… I’m not sure if it was quite as good as Melbourne Zoo (maybe because they didn’t have a nice Andy who let me in for a concession fare). But over all, dammit Australians know how to do zoos. There are all these little trails, like jungle trails, that you follow and all the enclosures are really nice. It makes me feel sad for that poor polar bear in Dublin Zoo. If only he knew what his cousins have, he’s be really rather put out.
While I was at the zoo, I was lucky enough to catch 2 talks, one at the sun bear enclosure where I got to see them getting fed!! And the other was at the crocodile enclosure. Man alive, he was the biggest fattest beast of a crocodile I’ve ever seen with my own eyes. I was secretly more than pleased that there was a great big bloody barrier between me and him or I think we would have had a repeat of the “Bear Incident” from Melbourne Zoo.
I’ve also had some good times in the hostel bar, where I got to know a couple from Tipp (yes, of course they mentioned the hurling, and yes of course they got a box) and the guy who runs the place. Now you’re not to get cross (well, come on, I AM 30 after all…) but yes, I did indulge in a couple of beers. But you’ll be very glad to hear that great fun and merriment was had by all. And that’s all I’m going to say on that subject.
Today I took a boat trip to Freemantle and back. The weather was absolutely glorious in a “no clouds as far as the eye can see” kind of way. I got very excited initially, because I thought I’d lost weight. I got some land when I realised that my legs only looked thinner because they’d retreated from the sunlight in shock. I was back to my usual uh, rubenesque self in no time. That said, I’m not going to complain because in fairness as soon as I got to Freemantle I proceeded to eat my way around the entire market (what?? There are no calories if nobody sees you eat it…). Oh nom, there was a feast of spinach and ricotta rolls, an onion bajji, a curry puff thing that was loovely, 2 pancakes and then I passed out. But I think there might have been an ice-cream incident but I was in a carb coma so I wont be held responsible.
After the market I decided to waddle up to Freemantle prison. Our guide was an English gentleman called John. Someone asked why we didn’t have a guide with an Australian accent (they were English) and fair play, he just turned around and said that when the prison was build his accent was and Australian accent. Good man John! They do torch lit tours that I’d like to do but I wouldn’t be brave enough to do one on my own, I’d need someone to throw to the wolves / poltergeist / demons - on my own I’d have no chance, especially if the evil beastie was hungry. Maybe I can convince someone to come back with me…
Apparently the prison is pretty much exactly the same as it was when it was built in the mid 1800’s which I thought was very interesting. John did explain too, that there’s a big distinction between convicts and prisoners - this I did not know! I kind of thought they were all in the one bucket (the ones that can’t run fast enough and therefore get caught), but John said that only the ones that were sent over from England were called convicts - anyone arrested locally was called a prisoner. I did get a little warm glow when I found out that the only escapees who weren’t ever caught were… Irish. Go on the boys in green hehe!
The boat trip on the way back was perfectly normal for 45 minutes of the hour’s journey when suddenly it all got a little surreal. First there were ACTUAL dolphins off the starboard (that’s right apparently) side of the boat. I actually shrieked out loud. Then the captain let me drive the boat (watch out for pics!) and to top it all off, the captain treated us to a rousing chorus of Waltzing Mathilda, followed by, wait for it, a rather grandiose version of “When Irish Eyes Are Smiling”!!!! how weird.
I was so excited by the dolphins that I booked a whale-watching cruise for tomorrow - full report on the way!
Right, well I suppose I better go, I need to do mundane things like drink coffee and read and smoke cigarettes…
Oh! I never did tell you about “The Incident” from this morning did I?? I think I’m just about ready to talk about it…
So, picture the scene: I’ve got out of bed, I’m hungry, I want to sit and eat and drink coffee and not much else. I go into the kitchen, go to MY cubby (well, it’s not like, actually mine per se) and…. GONE!! Everything was GONE! My apple. My stupid *healthy* wheat meal biscuits. MY CHOCOLATE BARS (I got a 12 pack of knock-off kit-kats in Woolworths for like, $1.50). Incited to near-murderous levels I stomped around for a bit, snorting until I realised that *nobody cared*. At that point I realised that I'd need to spring into Miss Marple mode, and I decided to have a quick look in the other cubbies on the off chance that they’d been moved - you know, you have to be measured and mature about these things. Lo and behold… THERE THEY WERE! Well. I really was relieved, but thought I’d better check the contents before I got too excited. Disaster. Oh my apple was there, and those stupid bloody healthy no fun biscuits. Oh they were there alright. My knock-off kitkats?? GONE.
From what I can deduce the thought process of the knock-off kit-kat thief went as follows: “om nom nom… I’m hungry… let’s see what I can steal… oooh, knock-off kit-kats… that’ll do… but wait, I’d better take only the knock-off kit-kats out of the bag, leave the outer back, and all the other stuff… ooh, now I feel guilty… I know what will make me feel better… I’ll just hide everything else somewhere totally different… there… gone… om nom nom.
I want to know: WHY the bloody hell did you not just throw the empty knock-off kit-kat outer wrapper in the bin but LEAVE the *boring* stuff where it was?? WHY did you mooooove it???? Did you think I wouldn't notice that you'd shamelessly made off with my knock-off kit-kats if you left the outer wrapper???? I hope you get bitten on the arse by a crocodile you big dirty knock-off kit-kat thief.
All I can say is he / she is very very luck indeed that I’m not hormonal right now. Carnage… that’s all I can say….
Anyway, I’m feeling much better about the whole thing than I was this morning. I know that I’m going to need time to heal, and to grieve for my knock-off kit-kats but I think time is a great healer. I guess the moral of the story is “trust nobody with your knock-off kit-kats”. Now that’s a mantra I can really get behind.
So that’s it from me for the moment. I love you and miss you, please send me all the news!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
Dear Mammy,
How are you? I am fine. I thought to myself I’d better write and update you on what I’ve been getting up to. If the truth be told I’m still a little bit shook up after “The Incident” this morning, but I’m determined not to let it ruin my trip. More on that subject once I’ve composed myself; even thinking about it makes me howl like a banshee on fire.
All in all, Perth is absolutely gorgeous. I didn’t quite understand what the guidebook meant when they described Perth as ‘liveable’. I think I get it now. It’s a modern city with everything your little heart could want (even if you made something up just for the hell of it and demanded that, they’d probably have that too), but the city also has a lovely laid back vibe. It makes me wonder if they really do have it sussed - work to live, NOT live to work. I think the fact that the city itself is so pretty just adds to the overall atmosphere.
I’ve done a lot of the usual touristy stuff. Sorry? OF COURSE I did the Big Jolly Tourist Bus. Really, what a ridiculous question… I’ll let you away with it but only because you’re my mammy, and I’ve not forgotten that wooden spoon Iloveyoumammy… where was I? Oh yes, the bus. As usual the ticket lasted for 2 days so I was able to get my money’s worth (I know, you’re very proud). The first day, I went up to Kings Park. WOW. The scenery is divine and the views are incredible. They even have some examples of boab trees - I’ve never before seen a tree that could just as easily hopped out of Tim Burton’s imagination. I *want* one. Not sure what I’d do with it mind you, but that hardly matters now, does it??
I went to Perth Zoo too. I think I’d like to work in the zoo, it looks like such a fab place to work. But I digress… I’m not sure if it was quite as good as Melbourne Zoo (maybe because they didn’t have a nice Andy who let me in for a concession fare). But over all, dammit Australians know how to do zoos. There are all these little trails, like jungle trails, that you follow and all the enclosures are really nice. It makes me feel sad for that poor polar bear in Dublin Zoo. If only he knew what his cousins have, he’s be really rather put out.
While I was at the zoo, I was lucky enough to catch 2 talks, one at the sun bear enclosure where I got to see them getting fed!! And the other was at the crocodile enclosure. Man alive, he was the biggest fattest beast of a crocodile I’ve ever seen with my own eyes. I was secretly more than pleased that there was a great big bloody barrier between me and him or I think we would have had a repeat of the “Bear Incident” from Melbourne Zoo.
I’ve also had some good times in the hostel bar, where I got to know a couple from Tipp (yes, of course they mentioned the hurling, and yes of course they got a box) and the guy who runs the place. Now you’re not to get cross (well, come on, I AM 30 after all…) but yes, I did indulge in a couple of beers. But you’ll be very glad to hear that great fun and merriment was had by all. And that’s all I’m going to say on that subject.
Today I took a boat trip to Freemantle and back. The weather was absolutely glorious in a “no clouds as far as the eye can see” kind of way. I got very excited initially, because I thought I’d lost weight. I got some land when I realised that my legs only looked thinner because they’d retreated from the sunlight in shock. I was back to my usual uh, rubenesque self in no time. That said, I’m not going to complain because in fairness as soon as I got to Freemantle I proceeded to eat my way around the entire market (what?? There are no calories if nobody sees you eat it…). Oh nom, there was a feast of spinach and ricotta rolls, an onion bajji, a curry puff thing that was loovely, 2 pancakes and then I passed out. But I think there might have been an ice-cream incident but I was in a carb coma so I wont be held responsible.
After the market I decided to waddle up to Freemantle prison. Our guide was an English gentleman called John. Someone asked why we didn’t have a guide with an Australian accent (they were English) and fair play, he just turned around and said that when the prison was build his accent was and Australian accent. Good man John! They do torch lit tours that I’d like to do but I wouldn’t be brave enough to do one on my own, I’d need someone to throw to the wolves / poltergeist / demons - on my own I’d have no chance, especially if the evil beastie was hungry. Maybe I can convince someone to come back with me…
Apparently the prison is pretty much exactly the same as it was when it was built in the mid 1800’s which I thought was very interesting. John did explain too, that there’s a big distinction between convicts and prisoners - this I did not know! I kind of thought they were all in the one bucket (the ones that can’t run fast enough and therefore get caught), but John said that only the ones that were sent over from England were called convicts - anyone arrested locally was called a prisoner. I did get a little warm glow when I found out that the only escapees who weren’t ever caught were… Irish. Go on the boys in green hehe!
The boat trip on the way back was perfectly normal for 45 minutes of the hour’s journey when suddenly it all got a little surreal. First there were ACTUAL dolphins off the starboard (that’s right apparently) side of the boat. I actually shrieked out loud. Then the captain let me drive the boat (watch out for pics!) and to top it all off, the captain treated us to a rousing chorus of Waltzing Mathilda, followed by, wait for it, a rather grandiose version of “When Irish Eyes Are Smiling”!!!! how weird.
I was so excited by the dolphins that I booked a whale-watching cruise for tomorrow - full report on the way!
Right, well I suppose I better go, I need to do mundane things like drink coffee and read and smoke cigarettes…
Oh! I never did tell you about “The Incident” from this morning did I?? I think I’m just about ready to talk about it…
So, picture the scene: I’ve got out of bed, I’m hungry, I want to sit and eat and drink coffee and not much else. I go into the kitchen, go to MY cubby (well, it’s not like, actually mine per se) and…. GONE!! Everything was GONE! My apple. My stupid *healthy* wheat meal biscuits. MY CHOCOLATE BARS (I got a 12 pack of knock-off kit-kats in Woolworths for like, $1.50). Incited to near-murderous levels I stomped around for a bit, snorting until I realised that *nobody cared*. At that point I realised that I'd need to spring into Miss Marple mode, and I decided to have a quick look in the other cubbies on the off chance that they’d been moved - you know, you have to be measured and mature about these things. Lo and behold… THERE THEY WERE! Well. I really was relieved, but thought I’d better check the contents before I got too excited. Disaster. Oh my apple was there, and those stupid bloody healthy no fun biscuits. Oh they were there alright. My knock-off kitkats?? GONE.
From what I can deduce the thought process of the knock-off kit-kat thief went as follows: “om nom nom… I’m hungry… let’s see what I can steal… oooh, knock-off kit-kats… that’ll do… but wait, I’d better take only the knock-off kit-kats out of the bag, leave the outer back, and all the other stuff… ooh, now I feel guilty… I know what will make me feel better… I’ll just hide everything else somewhere totally different… there… gone… om nom nom.
I want to know: WHY the bloody hell did you not just throw the empty knock-off kit-kat outer wrapper in the bin but LEAVE the *boring* stuff where it was?? WHY did you mooooove it???? Did you think I wouldn't notice that you'd shamelessly made off with my knock-off kit-kats if you left the outer wrapper???? I hope you get bitten on the arse by a crocodile you big dirty knock-off kit-kat thief.
All I can say is he / she is very very luck indeed that I’m not hormonal right now. Carnage… that’s all I can say….
Anyway, I’m feeling much better about the whole thing than I was this morning. I know that I’m going to need time to heal, and to grieve for my knock-off kit-kats but I think time is a great healer. I guess the moral of the story is “trust nobody with your knock-off kit-kats”. Now that’s a mantra I can really get behind.
So that’s it from me for the moment. I love you and miss you, please send me all the news!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
The Overland, Adelaide and the Indian Pacific
Dear Mammy,
How are you? I am fine. I’m pleased to report that, to date, I’ve not been arrested. Let’s uh, hope it stays that way…
I left Melbourne on September 11th (hope that’s not too ominous!). I took the Overland train from Melbourne to Adelaide. The train journey took 10 hours!! Compared to the small trains that we have in Ireland this one was pretty swanky, I was quite impressed. My biggest issue was with the woman behind me who would declare very loudly every 20 minutes that she was hanging for a cigarette. This would have been fine except that there was no smoking on the train, and when we did stop we weren’t allowed off the train. Yes. Exactly. By the time I arrived in Adelaide I was ready to pull out a cigarette and start chewing. Or chewing a limb off. Or simply sit in the middle of the aisle and start shouting obscenities at the top of my lungs. You’ll be relieved to hear that I did none of the above. I grinned, bore it, and chewed off every nail on both hands. Boy was I ever glad to arrive in Adelaide.
The nicotine deprivation was made worse by my fluctuating mood. On one hand, I was very excited to get going, actually do some travelling. On the other, I was, to put it mildly, missing Simon within pretty much the first 5 minutes of getting on the train. I couldn’t decide how I felt so I spent most of the journey staring out the window. There was some pretty scenery (I can’t get over how prehistoric gum trees look - I keep expecting to see a pterodactyl), but mainly there were just towns that looked like frontier towns. Like, American frontier. I suppose it’s all that space. Loughboy it most certainly wasn’t!
From what I’ve seen so far, admittedly in the dark, it’s an odd sort of city, I’m not sure I’ve really taken to it. I guess Melbourne has a lot to answer for! Let’s see what it’s like in daylight.
Well now! In the daylight it’s a little less forlorn than it is at night. I literally slept for nigh on 11 hours and woke in the morning to be greeted by glorious sunshine and actual people on the street (I was beginning to suspect that nobody lives in Adelaide with the exception of the nice Chinese gentleman who fed me). I wandered around and found a shopping district where I bought a note book and ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ - I felt vindicated as I too, am a woman in my 30s (just) who left a fairly daycent job to, well, nothing, just to run away. I also stumbled upon a Malaysian festival where I was suitably rewarded with the mother load of Laksa - YUM!! I am reborn.
Part 2: So, after a whistle-stop tour of Adelaide, I boarded the Indian Pacific train to Perth. The train is actually pretty ok, there’s plenty of leg space in chicken class (what?? You didn’t think I’d shelled out for a fancay schmancay sleeper now did you??). I did however shell out the $15 for a blue paper wristband that, apparently gives me access to a secret super-lounge and unlimited tea and coffee - given the amount of coffee I drink I felt that was a bargain. Because I boarded at 6:30pm it was dark, and I saw absolutely nothing. That said, I had a great time eating biscuits and reading. I was worried about the prospect of needing to be rolled off the train.
I met a very sweet lady called Virginia and had a long chat with her in the lounge car. She is a nurse and was going to go work on an aboriginal community settlement about 500k from the back arse of nowhere. We had a long chat about aboriginal people and the issues they’re facing. I have to say it was food for thought. A very interesting lady, who had married an irish sailor (really, why did nobody warn her, the poor dear), and she recounted a funny story about arriving in Ireland in the mid-60’s and the first thing she saw at the ferry port was a big sign reading “No Contraceptives”. That made me giggle. I assured her that they’re now allowed.
In the morning I woke to miles upon miles of scrub land - it was really quite something. I thought I’d reached the Nulabor plain (it means no trees, because there are well, no trees) and felt quite disgruntled. There bloody well were trees. Nulabor my arse, more like Abor-abuntum. Then I realised that this was just the precursor. Once we hit the plain there was LITERALLY, I’m not kidding, literally nothing for hundreds of miles in every direction - it’s the most mind-boggling thing I’ve ever seen. And not one bungalow built anywhere. Easy known the Irish haven’t got here yet… The urge to start chewing on my vastly underutilized pack of Marlboro Gold was tempered only by the view out the window and the copious amounts of free coffee. That said, I began to pray like crazy that we’d get to Cook, not to see Cook you understand, no, just to have a cigarette. It was *that* bad. Word of warning to any smokers - if you’re intending taking a train trip in Australia (anywhere), I’ve only one word for you - Nicorette. And lots of it. Be warned, your nicotine withdrawal symptoms will most definitely not be helped by the unique experience of Garth Brooks entire back catalogue sans base. Yep. Imagine it. Make sure you get a good mental picture. No really. NICOTINE!!!
Cook really was the epitome of a ghost town. There was some dirt tracks, a couple of small houses and an old school house. It’s really very difficult to imagine anyone being able to survive out there so far from anything. No mobile phone reception, that’s all I’ll say… We didn’t stop long in Cook, only about half an hour, then it was on to Kalgoorlie. The journey in between consisted of reading, reflecting, thinking and eating. Not necessarily in that order.
I decided to book on a guided tour of Kalgoorlie because I figured it would be dark when I got there and wasn’t too keen to go wandering around by myself. I was especially glad that I’d gone with this plan when the train manager announced that the police had had some “trouble” with the locals and that we shouldn’t go wandering around on our own. As it turns out, the locals appear to be hunting tourists for sport. Not with like, shot guns or anything, but still, I think that even I would have been nervous on my own.
The tour was actually quite interesting. I joined up with a girl called Emma who is moving lock stock and barrel out to Perth. I was very glad to have someone my own age - the average age other than us 2 was about 459. The bus drove us around town where we saw some pretty old buildings, very reminiscent of an American film about a wild west town, all with big balcony / veranda things. Next we drove up to the mine - the Super Pit - it was very impressive but definitely I think I would have liked to have seen it in daylight. I thought there were Tonka trucks driving around until I got my head around just how deep that thing is. Sure wouldn’t like to fall down!! Finally, back on the bus, the last part of the tour took in the 2nd most common form of employment in an old wild west mining town - yup, the brothels. Nothing like you’d see in Amsterdam, but that said, they too had that old wild west saloon feel about them. I think the strangest thing I’ve ever seen (now) is a brothel that does guided tours during the day, doubles up as a café selling coffee and cakes (also during the day) and then does what Mama Madam intended at night. Very very odd!
I got talking to this lovely English couple who were at the end of their year and were heading back home soon. They were very upset to be leaving - a premonition methinks for what lies ahead for me! They had some amazing times, including working in a zoo in North Queensland. I met a lovely Scottish couple too, but they, like me were at the beginning of their trip.
At last, back on the train, all smoked out and ready for the last leg. I was very much looking forward to the adventures that lay ahead in Perth.
I’m very glad that I had the opportunity to experience this, the mind boggles at the prospect of crossing almost an entire continent on a train. I promise to post the pics I managed to get before my camera died as soon as I get a good t’internet connection.
Hope all’s well at home. Love you lots, please send me all the news!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
How are you? I am fine. I’m pleased to report that, to date, I’ve not been arrested. Let’s uh, hope it stays that way…
I left Melbourne on September 11th (hope that’s not too ominous!). I took the Overland train from Melbourne to Adelaide. The train journey took 10 hours!! Compared to the small trains that we have in Ireland this one was pretty swanky, I was quite impressed. My biggest issue was with the woman behind me who would declare very loudly every 20 minutes that she was hanging for a cigarette. This would have been fine except that there was no smoking on the train, and when we did stop we weren’t allowed off the train. Yes. Exactly. By the time I arrived in Adelaide I was ready to pull out a cigarette and start chewing. Or chewing a limb off. Or simply sit in the middle of the aisle and start shouting obscenities at the top of my lungs. You’ll be relieved to hear that I did none of the above. I grinned, bore it, and chewed off every nail on both hands. Boy was I ever glad to arrive in Adelaide.
The nicotine deprivation was made worse by my fluctuating mood. On one hand, I was very excited to get going, actually do some travelling. On the other, I was, to put it mildly, missing Simon within pretty much the first 5 minutes of getting on the train. I couldn’t decide how I felt so I spent most of the journey staring out the window. There was some pretty scenery (I can’t get over how prehistoric gum trees look - I keep expecting to see a pterodactyl), but mainly there were just towns that looked like frontier towns. Like, American frontier. I suppose it’s all that space. Loughboy it most certainly wasn’t!
From what I’ve seen so far, admittedly in the dark, it’s an odd sort of city, I’m not sure I’ve really taken to it. I guess Melbourne has a lot to answer for! Let’s see what it’s like in daylight.
Well now! In the daylight it’s a little less forlorn than it is at night. I literally slept for nigh on 11 hours and woke in the morning to be greeted by glorious sunshine and actual people on the street (I was beginning to suspect that nobody lives in Adelaide with the exception of the nice Chinese gentleman who fed me). I wandered around and found a shopping district where I bought a note book and ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ - I felt vindicated as I too, am a woman in my 30s (just) who left a fairly daycent job to, well, nothing, just to run away. I also stumbled upon a Malaysian festival where I was suitably rewarded with the mother load of Laksa - YUM!! I am reborn.
Part 2: So, after a whistle-stop tour of Adelaide, I boarded the Indian Pacific train to Perth. The train is actually pretty ok, there’s plenty of leg space in chicken class (what?? You didn’t think I’d shelled out for a fancay schmancay sleeper now did you??). I did however shell out the $15 for a blue paper wristband that, apparently gives me access to a secret super-lounge and unlimited tea and coffee - given the amount of coffee I drink I felt that was a bargain. Because I boarded at 6:30pm it was dark, and I saw absolutely nothing. That said, I had a great time eating biscuits and reading. I was worried about the prospect of needing to be rolled off the train.
I met a very sweet lady called Virginia and had a long chat with her in the lounge car. She is a nurse and was going to go work on an aboriginal community settlement about 500k from the back arse of nowhere. We had a long chat about aboriginal people and the issues they’re facing. I have to say it was food for thought. A very interesting lady, who had married an irish sailor (really, why did nobody warn her, the poor dear), and she recounted a funny story about arriving in Ireland in the mid-60’s and the first thing she saw at the ferry port was a big sign reading “No Contraceptives”. That made me giggle. I assured her that they’re now allowed.
In the morning I woke to miles upon miles of scrub land - it was really quite something. I thought I’d reached the Nulabor plain (it means no trees, because there are well, no trees) and felt quite disgruntled. There bloody well were trees. Nulabor my arse, more like Abor-abuntum. Then I realised that this was just the precursor. Once we hit the plain there was LITERALLY, I’m not kidding, literally nothing for hundreds of miles in every direction - it’s the most mind-boggling thing I’ve ever seen. And not one bungalow built anywhere. Easy known the Irish haven’t got here yet… The urge to start chewing on my vastly underutilized pack of Marlboro Gold was tempered only by the view out the window and the copious amounts of free coffee. That said, I began to pray like crazy that we’d get to Cook, not to see Cook you understand, no, just to have a cigarette. It was *that* bad. Word of warning to any smokers - if you’re intending taking a train trip in Australia (anywhere), I’ve only one word for you - Nicorette. And lots of it. Be warned, your nicotine withdrawal symptoms will most definitely not be helped by the unique experience of Garth Brooks entire back catalogue sans base. Yep. Imagine it. Make sure you get a good mental picture. No really. NICOTINE!!!
Cook really was the epitome of a ghost town. There was some dirt tracks, a couple of small houses and an old school house. It’s really very difficult to imagine anyone being able to survive out there so far from anything. No mobile phone reception, that’s all I’ll say… We didn’t stop long in Cook, only about half an hour, then it was on to Kalgoorlie. The journey in between consisted of reading, reflecting, thinking and eating. Not necessarily in that order.
I decided to book on a guided tour of Kalgoorlie because I figured it would be dark when I got there and wasn’t too keen to go wandering around by myself. I was especially glad that I’d gone with this plan when the train manager announced that the police had had some “trouble” with the locals and that we shouldn’t go wandering around on our own. As it turns out, the locals appear to be hunting tourists for sport. Not with like, shot guns or anything, but still, I think that even I would have been nervous on my own.
The tour was actually quite interesting. I joined up with a girl called Emma who is moving lock stock and barrel out to Perth. I was very glad to have someone my own age - the average age other than us 2 was about 459. The bus drove us around town where we saw some pretty old buildings, very reminiscent of an American film about a wild west town, all with big balcony / veranda things. Next we drove up to the mine - the Super Pit - it was very impressive but definitely I think I would have liked to have seen it in daylight. I thought there were Tonka trucks driving around until I got my head around just how deep that thing is. Sure wouldn’t like to fall down!! Finally, back on the bus, the last part of the tour took in the 2nd most common form of employment in an old wild west mining town - yup, the brothels. Nothing like you’d see in Amsterdam, but that said, they too had that old wild west saloon feel about them. I think the strangest thing I’ve ever seen (now) is a brothel that does guided tours during the day, doubles up as a café selling coffee and cakes (also during the day) and then does what Mama Madam intended at night. Very very odd!
I got talking to this lovely English couple who were at the end of their year and were heading back home soon. They were very upset to be leaving - a premonition methinks for what lies ahead for me! They had some amazing times, including working in a zoo in North Queensland. I met a lovely Scottish couple too, but they, like me were at the beginning of their trip.
At last, back on the train, all smoked out and ready for the last leg. I was very much looking forward to the adventures that lay ahead in Perth.
I’m very glad that I had the opportunity to experience this, the mind boggles at the prospect of crossing almost an entire continent on a train. I promise to post the pics I managed to get before my camera died as soon as I get a good t’internet connection.
Hope all’s well at home. Love you lots, please send me all the news!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
Snow, the Zoo, one bedroom philosopher and dropping the F-Bomb in front of Nana
Dear Mammy,
How are you? I am fine. I was a little taken aback at Bridget’s issues with the Penguins. Maybe it’s best I simply don’t tell her about the Kangaroos…
So much has happened since I last wrote, and I have to say I do truly love Melbourne - I will be very sad to leave and definitely understand now how people could end up coming to Oz for a year and getting stuck. There’s simply no place like, uh, home (yes I know that sounds weird hehe!).
On Friday Simon took a notion and decided we were going skiing. We gathered up Lisa, Charlie and Uwe and headed up to Mt. Buller (it took me a while to find it on Google as I kept trying to find Mt Bulla - you got to love that Ozzie accent). Simon and Uwe went skiing but myself and the girls decided toboggans were the way forward. It was all going super well until Charlie decided to go down head first. I’m pleased to report that she’s still, um, more or less in one piece but I think that’s mainly down to her amazing natural barrel-rolling talents.
Definitely 3 highlights of the day:
1. We stopped off for breakfast beer, uh, I mean, beer after uh, 6pm, uh. Yeah. Anywaaay… I ordered an Irish coffee and got ID’d.. HAHA. I think that’s some sort of record - I got ID’d buying alcohol at 30 years of age - the gauntlet has been laid!
2. I think Lisa has the same ‘other peoples children’ issues that I do. I’m not quite sure what happened but when we were on the chairlift, some child didn’t realise that we were not getting off (what, you’re not here to judge, it was FUN!) anyway, so she went to jump on. One way or another, Lisa ended up pulling away on the chairlift still holding one of her jousting sticks. It’s ok, she threw it away and I don’t think she hit anyone. I think… Oh, I’ve since found out that jousting sticks are called ski poles. Go figure.
3. I got to go on a snow-mobile!! We were supposed to meet the boys at the top of the mountain for nibbles but we weren’t allowed to get on the super-dooper-fancy chairlift because we didn’t have skis/ we tried arguing but the lady was having none of it. So there we were looking very cold and pathetic when this guy pulls up on a snow mobile. Success! In my defence, I DID ask him if he was a homicidal maniac (he said yes) but it was too late because I was already mid air when I asked. Anyway, not to worry, it turned out he was just a good Samaritan (my new BFF Jeff). He delivered me to the top and then went back for the 2 girls. I totally want a snow mobile for my birthday.
Moving on! Later in the week I got to go to a gig by this Ozzie comedian guy called the Bedroom Philosopher. I have a funny feeling that I didn’t get all the references but feck it, I enjoyed what I got. And the hippies got me in for free - those ladies are the business! I mean, I woulda paid but it was sold out - what’s a girl to do??
On Father’s Day Simon brought me to lunch with - well, a whole host of family members really. Ironically his father had gone camping, but we’ll let him away with it - it was father’s day after all - if there’s one day a father gets to do what he wants it should be then I suppose. I wouldn’t know hehe. So it was all going swimmingly until someone brought up “The Story of the Tram”. Sure didn’t I get all into the story and what did I do only drop the F-Bomb in front of Nana. I hope she didn’t notice. I tried to salvage it by telling them I couldn’t help it, that I was raised by wild baboons (sorry…) but I don’t think they believed me. Don’t think they held it against me.
My other big highlight was going to Melbourne Zoo. I’m not normally a fan of animals behind bars but this zoo really is lovely. The enclosures seem to be well thought out and the animals have some space at least. I got lucky at the entrance! A lovely Scottish man called Andy gave me a concession fare purely because of my Irish accent! He said he’d been here 39 years, I was gob smacked because he sounded as Scottish as well… uh, a Scottish person. I had a dodgy moment when I came to the bear enclosure. I didn’t realise that there was a ledge that was impossible to climb - from my perspective there was a 3 foot wall, some rocks, some water and tadaaaah 2 great big bloody brown bears. All was going fine until one looked up and saw me. I’m not joking, that bear had murder in his heart and NOM NOM in his eyes. I hightailed it out of there but admittedly felt really quite silly when I saw “The Ledge” from the other side. I did get a giggle out of it though. And of course, I wasn’t eaten by a bear.
I’m getting set to head to Adelaide and then on to Perth. I’m excited but feeling a little sad to be leaving Melbourne and all the cool and wonderful peoples I’ve met there.
I’ll keep you posted on my progress. And I am honestly sorry about the baboon thing, I think I panicked.
Love you lots!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
How are you? I am fine. I was a little taken aback at Bridget’s issues with the Penguins. Maybe it’s best I simply don’t tell her about the Kangaroos…
So much has happened since I last wrote, and I have to say I do truly love Melbourne - I will be very sad to leave and definitely understand now how people could end up coming to Oz for a year and getting stuck. There’s simply no place like, uh, home (yes I know that sounds weird hehe!).
On Friday Simon took a notion and decided we were going skiing. We gathered up Lisa, Charlie and Uwe and headed up to Mt. Buller (it took me a while to find it on Google as I kept trying to find Mt Bulla - you got to love that Ozzie accent). Simon and Uwe went skiing but myself and the girls decided toboggans were the way forward. It was all going super well until Charlie decided to go down head first. I’m pleased to report that she’s still, um, more or less in one piece but I think that’s mainly down to her amazing natural barrel-rolling talents.
Definitely 3 highlights of the day:
1. We stopped off for breakfast beer, uh, I mean, beer after uh, 6pm, uh. Yeah. Anywaaay… I ordered an Irish coffee and got ID’d.. HAHA. I think that’s some sort of record - I got ID’d buying alcohol at 30 years of age - the gauntlet has been laid!
2. I think Lisa has the same ‘other peoples children’ issues that I do. I’m not quite sure what happened but when we were on the chairlift, some child didn’t realise that we were not getting off (what, you’re not here to judge, it was FUN!) anyway, so she went to jump on. One way or another, Lisa ended up pulling away on the chairlift still holding one of her jousting sticks. It’s ok, she threw it away and I don’t think she hit anyone. I think… Oh, I’ve since found out that jousting sticks are called ski poles. Go figure.
3. I got to go on a snow-mobile!! We were supposed to meet the boys at the top of the mountain for nibbles but we weren’t allowed to get on the super-dooper-fancy chairlift because we didn’t have skis/ we tried arguing but the lady was having none of it. So there we were looking very cold and pathetic when this guy pulls up on a snow mobile. Success! In my defence, I DID ask him if he was a homicidal maniac (he said yes) but it was too late because I was already mid air when I asked. Anyway, not to worry, it turned out he was just a good Samaritan (my new BFF Jeff). He delivered me to the top and then went back for the 2 girls. I totally want a snow mobile for my birthday.
Moving on! Later in the week I got to go to a gig by this Ozzie comedian guy called the Bedroom Philosopher. I have a funny feeling that I didn’t get all the references but feck it, I enjoyed what I got. And the hippies got me in for free - those ladies are the business! I mean, I woulda paid but it was sold out - what’s a girl to do??
On Father’s Day Simon brought me to lunch with - well, a whole host of family members really. Ironically his father had gone camping, but we’ll let him away with it - it was father’s day after all - if there’s one day a father gets to do what he wants it should be then I suppose. I wouldn’t know hehe. So it was all going swimmingly until someone brought up “The Story of the Tram”. Sure didn’t I get all into the story and what did I do only drop the F-Bomb in front of Nana. I hope she didn’t notice. I tried to salvage it by telling them I couldn’t help it, that I was raised by wild baboons (sorry…) but I don’t think they believed me. Don’t think they held it against me.
My other big highlight was going to Melbourne Zoo. I’m not normally a fan of animals behind bars but this zoo really is lovely. The enclosures seem to be well thought out and the animals have some space at least. I got lucky at the entrance! A lovely Scottish man called Andy gave me a concession fare purely because of my Irish accent! He said he’d been here 39 years, I was gob smacked because he sounded as Scottish as well… uh, a Scottish person. I had a dodgy moment when I came to the bear enclosure. I didn’t realise that there was a ledge that was impossible to climb - from my perspective there was a 3 foot wall, some rocks, some water and tadaaaah 2 great big bloody brown bears. All was going fine until one looked up and saw me. I’m not joking, that bear had murder in his heart and NOM NOM in his eyes. I hightailed it out of there but admittedly felt really quite silly when I saw “The Ledge” from the other side. I did get a giggle out of it though. And of course, I wasn’t eaten by a bear.
I’m getting set to head to Adelaide and then on to Perth. I’m excited but feeling a little sad to be leaving Melbourne and all the cool and wonderful peoples I’ve met there.
I’ll keep you posted on my progress. And I am honestly sorry about the baboon thing, I think I panicked.
Love you lots!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Titanic, good food and PonyPonyPonyPony!!!
Dear Mammy,
How are you? I am fine. I was somewhat disconcerted to hear of Bridget's uh, 'issues' with the penguins. I assure you they're lovely. Please remind her that she's still my number one cat but really, she's going to have to accept that penguins are lovely. I uh, really like penguins. Anyhiu...
Things are going great, and I'm really enjoying Melbourne. This week there were some lazy days, but getting to know the locals has been lots of fun!
This week I went to the museum. In true me style, I managed to arrive at 3pm - given the amount to see at the Melbourne Museum, and given that it closes at 5pm, I really probably didn't think that through much. But on the plus side, I get to go back! I saw the Titanic exhibition which was really very well done! The ticket is a replica boarding pass and it just gets better from there. The highlights were the recreated cabins, the corridor and - wait for it - they actually recreated the staircase from the film - slackjawed in awe! Better again, someone actually saw fit to include a miniature iceberg - a REAL one - it was actual ice and you could touch it. I suppose it was more for people who had never seen ice before but still, I was muchly impressed. The only catch was I kept hearing *that* feckin song... neeeeeeeeear.... faaaaaaaar.... whereeeeeeeeever youuuu aaaaaaaree... you know the one... luckily it was only in my head so I drowned it out by humming Sysstem of a Down really loudly. All in all, vair impressed. I saw some of the other exhibits but at a sprint because of the impending closing time. Will go back, and send full report at a later date.
Apart from that, there's been LOTS of eating. I'm afraid of beaches now, in case Greenpeace show up, thankfully it's too cold to wear a bikini... The Chinese food is out of this world (well, the bits I can get in my mouth anyway, am still mastering chop sticks) and there's a beeeooootiful veggie restaurant in St Kilda called Soul Mama - NOM NOM! You can eat everything on the menu (you could probably eat the actual menu but I wouldn't recommend that) and it's got views of St Kilda beach - heaven!
Last weekend Shay and Jackie came down from Brisbane - queue all manner of madness! We did the rounds of several bars, and ended up in this metal (almost typed mental, also appropriate) bar called Insignia. My favourite memory was Shay in the middle of all the rocker-types in his white shirt and jeans giving it welly! I believe there was an incident involving Shay and some railings but don't quote me on that... I also have a vague memory of headbanging to Zombie (cranberries) for no good reason other than it's Irish and so are we. Hey, at least we weren't singing Danny Boy and crying... Ha. We decamped to the infamous Pony bar after that and promptly got adopted by some poor lunatic called Al. Poor Al. I think he went away in the end but I couldn't be sure. Someone may have eaten him.
The night ended with my biggest faux pas to date - yes, the Law of Shoe. I think it's a quaint Australian custom, and I'm very pleased to have been so readily embraced by the locals. The law states that, if you fall asleep with your shoes on, your companions must immediately acquire a writing instrument and decorate your face. The usual custom is to adorn the sleepy one's face with boy-parts (don't worry, I wont elaborate, I'm still aware of the Law of Wooden Spoon). I got away easy, all they did was play Xs and Os on my face. I managed to have an hour long conversation in the morning without my new face-art being brought to my attention. I think this means I've officially "gone native". What an odd custom. You'll be glad to know it rubbed off. Fools didn't find my waterproof eyeliner (sniggers).
On Friday we're going to the mountains to play in the snow. I'm preparing my snowball-arm as we speak by lifting weights. They're all GOING DOWN! muhahahahaha.
Finally, I've booked my ticket to Perth so I'll be taking off from Melbourne on Saturday week. But I'm going by train! woohoo! the romance of it all! I will of course keep you posted on all of my adventures.
Love and hugs!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
*Oh, by the way, I think I left the light on in the attic, you might want to check that.
How are you? I am fine. I was somewhat disconcerted to hear of Bridget's uh, 'issues' with the penguins. I assure you they're lovely. Please remind her that she's still my number one cat but really, she's going to have to accept that penguins are lovely. I uh, really like penguins. Anyhiu...
Things are going great, and I'm really enjoying Melbourne. This week there were some lazy days, but getting to know the locals has been lots of fun!
This week I went to the museum. In true me style, I managed to arrive at 3pm - given the amount to see at the Melbourne Museum, and given that it closes at 5pm, I really probably didn't think that through much. But on the plus side, I get to go back! I saw the Titanic exhibition which was really very well done! The ticket is a replica boarding pass and it just gets better from there. The highlights were the recreated cabins, the corridor and - wait for it - they actually recreated the staircase from the film - slackjawed in awe! Better again, someone actually saw fit to include a miniature iceberg - a REAL one - it was actual ice and you could touch it. I suppose it was more for people who had never seen ice before but still, I was muchly impressed. The only catch was I kept hearing *that* feckin song... neeeeeeeeear.... faaaaaaaar.... whereeeeeeeeever youuuu aaaaaaaree... you know the one... luckily it was only in my head so I drowned it out by humming Sysstem of a Down really loudly. All in all, vair impressed. I saw some of the other exhibits but at a sprint because of the impending closing time. Will go back, and send full report at a later date.
Apart from that, there's been LOTS of eating. I'm afraid of beaches now, in case Greenpeace show up, thankfully it's too cold to wear a bikini... The Chinese food is out of this world (well, the bits I can get in my mouth anyway, am still mastering chop sticks) and there's a beeeooootiful veggie restaurant in St Kilda called Soul Mama - NOM NOM! You can eat everything on the menu (you could probably eat the actual menu but I wouldn't recommend that) and it's got views of St Kilda beach - heaven!
Last weekend Shay and Jackie came down from Brisbane - queue all manner of madness! We did the rounds of several bars, and ended up in this metal (almost typed mental, also appropriate) bar called Insignia. My favourite memory was Shay in the middle of all the rocker-types in his white shirt and jeans giving it welly! I believe there was an incident involving Shay and some railings but don't quote me on that... I also have a vague memory of headbanging to Zombie (cranberries) for no good reason other than it's Irish and so are we. Hey, at least we weren't singing Danny Boy and crying... Ha. We decamped to the infamous Pony bar after that and promptly got adopted by some poor lunatic called Al. Poor Al. I think he went away in the end but I couldn't be sure. Someone may have eaten him.
The night ended with my biggest faux pas to date - yes, the Law of Shoe. I think it's a quaint Australian custom, and I'm very pleased to have been so readily embraced by the locals. The law states that, if you fall asleep with your shoes on, your companions must immediately acquire a writing instrument and decorate your face. The usual custom is to adorn the sleepy one's face with boy-parts (don't worry, I wont elaborate, I'm still aware of the Law of Wooden Spoon). I got away easy, all they did was play Xs and Os on my face. I managed to have an hour long conversation in the morning without my new face-art being brought to my attention. I think this means I've officially "gone native". What an odd custom. You'll be glad to know it rubbed off. Fools didn't find my waterproof eyeliner (sniggers).
On Friday we're going to the mountains to play in the snow. I'm preparing my snowball-arm as we speak by lifting weights. They're all GOING DOWN! muhahahahaha.
Finally, I've booked my ticket to Perth so I'll be taking off from Melbourne on Saturday week. But I'm going by train! woohoo! the romance of it all! I will of course keep you posted on all of my adventures.
Love and hugs!
Your Daughter (the one who ran away)
*Oh, by the way, I think I left the light on in the attic, you might want to check that.
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